sábado, 21 de setembro de 2013

Right kind of wrong


This week was, probably, the craziest, busiest and most tiring of the year. And yet, no, I would not trade it for the world...

Some multiple expositions that pretty much have everything to do with the chaotic time.
It's weird when I always find myself attached to the failed images, to the film roll that did not work right, to the light leaks, etc... I think that's what makes the magic of film photography ;)  





segunda-feira, 16 de setembro de 2013

How long to the weekend?

"Deus é um cara gozador, adora brincadeira
Pois pra me jogar no mundo tinha o mundo inteiro
Mas achou muito engraçado me botar cabrero
Na barriga da miséria nasci brasileiro"

- God is a funny guy, he loves to play jokes
‘Cause to throw me on the world, he had the whole world
But he thought it wold be funny to make me suspicious

Poor as hell I was born Brazilian -

When you're starting, probably, the most stressful week of the year, one can only listen to Chico Buarque and dream of the ocean...........

  





sexta-feira, 6 de setembro de 2013

segunda-feira, 26 de agosto de 2013

the road that stretches out ahead...................

"Do you remember when we once believed that everything was forever, without knowing that forever always ends


(*) "Do you have $2? Do you have alcohol? Do you have egg? Pray for me?"

quinta-feira, 8 de agosto de 2013

“I belong to this notebook and this pencil”

I read books over and over again. I have an enormous list of books I want to read (some of them I already bought), and then, I catch myself reading one of my favorites for the 1000000000th time.
I've been dreaming in French, so, I think I got nostalgic and Hamingway's "a movable feast" is my new old best friend.

"But then I knew that everything good and bad left an emptiness when it stopped. But if it was bad, the emptiness filled up by itself. If it was good you could only fill it by finding something better."





sexta-feira, 26 de julho de 2013

A glimpse of souvenirs

It's weird but cold and rainy days make me think back to my childhood, when mom would dress us up in our big blue school uniform coats and we were supposed to stay inside the classroom waiting to be picked up. It's either that, or some random rainy, chilly, grey walk at the Champs Élysées, running to catch a movie.
Minds do work in mysterious ways... 

"hanging around, nothing to do but frown
rainy days and Mondays always get me down"





terça-feira, 9 de julho de 2013

Are you living your dream?





Just for today, let’s pretend everything's ok. More than ok, just for today, let’s pretend everything’s perfect. Just for today, let’s pretend there’s nothing else but this. Just for today…


Just for today let’s focus on the bright side. Let me remind myself that I’m actually where I wanted and worked hard to be, just for today. Just for today, I’ll put all my worries aside and will smile.  Will smile for things may, actually, not be perfect, but I’m on the right path, just for today. Just for today, I’ll have it in mind. What about you, are you living your dream ?


quinta-feira, 23 de maio de 2013

"The falling leaves drift by the window..."

"Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck
Some nights I call it a draw
Some nights I wish that my lips could build a castle
Some nights I wish they'd just fall off

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh, Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for 
Most nights I don't know anymore...

This is it, boys, this is war - what are we waiting for?
Why don't we break the rules already?
I was never one to believe the hype
Save that for the black and white
I try twice as hard and I'm half as liked,
But here they come again to jack my style

That's alright
I found a martyr in my bed tonight
She stops my bones from wondering just who I am

Well, some nights I wish that this all would end
'Cause I could use some friends for a change.
And some nights I'm scared you'll forget me again
Some nights I always win, I always win..."


(you can listen to it here)

sexta-feira, 17 de maio de 2013

Living easy, livin' free


That morning I got to the office, opened the paper and while I waited for the computer to turn on I had a piece of grandma’s chocolate cake. I read my horoscope and thought about everything I had to do – the day before an opening night brings a lot of stress and a great amount of work that’s kind of scary; scary for you’re never sure you’ll be able to handle and even more scary to think of the calm that’ll come after it. I look at the pictures, I analyze the size of the article, but I always read what concerns me last, like it’s something special that I want to save it to enjoy up to the last minute.

It’s a grey and cool day, nothing like the warm sun that we had yesterday. Going down to the beach today it’s not going to be as troubled and stressful but it’s also not going to be as much fun. I hate hot days, but one must admit that sunny warm days match a day in the beach, even if you’re going to spend this day indoors working in a cultural center.

As I already said, that particular the day before yesterday was hot, and at the beach was even hotter. We hit the highway at around 4h30 PM. We had to get there early. 57 km later was the end of the road and we ended up in a small sort of avenue, which I happened to recognize. ‘Turn right’, ‘turn left’, ‘this way’, I said to my boss, who was driving, while I tried to talk on the phone to find out what was happening back at the office. I don’t really know how, but we soon saw the sea and without great difficulty we reached our destination.

When we got there we were running all around. Up the stairs, get the elevator, English, Portuguese, Italian, photographer. ‘Where’s everybody?’; ‘the rehearsal is about to start’; ‘we must have a full house’; ‘who’s coming to the opening night?’; “I need the pictures ASAP!’: ‘where’s the journalist?’; ‘she’s here. She was robed!’; ‘someone get her a paper and a pen for her. And some money so she can grab a coffee’; ‘everybody seated?’; ‘it’s over’; ‘amazing’; ‘gorgeous’, ‘genius’, ‘he thinks it’s too short’; ‘where are the actors?’; ‘the journalists are waiting’; ‘the director first’; ‘cell phone pictures for social network’; ‘I so feel like I’m at the beach…’; ‘is it over?’; ‘don’t forget to send me the pictures. ASAP!!!!’; who’s going back to the city?’; ‘did we pay the parking?’; ‘it’s open’.

Midnight is time to go home. And who said we knew how to go home? I was sure that all we had to do was to go straight ahead through the seaside promenade that we would get to the exit of the city. I remembered my mom teaching me the way a few months ago. The problem was that we didn't have enough gas to go back and, even if I could remember the way out, I had no idea where to find an open gas station. And don’t even get me starting on how bad we both had to pee.

We found a gas station, all hidden up and ignoring a no entry sign but, the important thing is that we found one. We got in and right after us, came a fast black car, with no lights on, also ignoring the no entry sign. Of course that attitude was more than enough for the boss to think that he was going to rob the gas station, kill everybody or throw a grenade that would extinguish half of the coast.  While she was terrified and trying to find someone to fill the tank I went looking for the pee area. Much better than me being all disgusted was the look on my boss’s face when she saw me leaving the small shop holding a key attached to a long yellow plastic chain and walking towards the oil change section. Small addendum: I always try to be that strong woman that handles everything and every challenge so well. I not made for all that girly attitude. I respect those who are, but it just doesn't work for me. Nevertheless, bathroom is a serious matter and girls can’t just pee anywhere they want and that gas station in the middle of nowhere was really not my ideal scenario. Well, lack of better choice and a good dose of courage and a great amount of liquid ready to leave my body, I went there anyway. I was about to close the door when my boss came running in, hands free (which meant our bags, cell phones and the car keys left unattended) to pee and telling me that the guy that did not rob the gas station was taking us to the road.

We followed him. I thought it was very brave of her to follow some men she did not know through a road she did not know, but I thought it was better than to be lost. As far as I understood, according to him, the path we've chosen was very dangerous. Of course that, at some point around the port area, my boss realized that she was following a complete stranger and all her trust went down the drain. “What if he kidnaps us?” I wanted to say something like ‘you should’ve thought about it earlier’ or ‘now’s too late’, but I couldn't  And not because she is my boss, but because at this point everything was just too funny and surreal it didn't make any difference.   

We took an enormous and useless detour. But the guy meant well. He was nosy, but he meant well, and really just wanted to help. Not everything’s lost. We hit the road at around 1 AM. No one was allowed to think that was still Tuesday and that we would have to do it all again in a couple of Day. The highway was dark and empty. “Go straight ahead!” – I indicate. “Where is straight ahead?”





I know I don't usually write all that much, but I felt like sharing all the writing I do...
Is it the weekend already? 

quarta-feira, 8 de maio de 2013

From out of space...

Long time no see... about 8 months.
No, I did not plan to get away from blogging (which I love) but, somehow, life got in the way.
But, well, one had to come back, eventually. Right?
And after a few unsuccessful tryouts, here I am.

Let's see what we've missed out since Semptember 2012.
I saw the Berliner Ensemble perform (Lulu and The Three Penny Opera) directed by Robert Wilson and it was AMAZING. (Berliner ensemble performance checked out of my to do list)
Alonso did not win the F1 championship (even if it was very very very close), and I was really upset.
Had an unexpected and very pleasant visit from France (always miss my French friends), and now I have one of my best friends from my French University who's here in Brazil.
I turned 30 last December, and the world did not end in 21/12/12 (although turning 30 was quite close to it a few days earlier... lol)
Went to Bahia for new years on a quiet family party.
One of my childhood best friends got married and I cried my eyes out!!
Went to spend "carnaval" (mardi gras) in NYC with my french BFF big brother who I miss so so so so so much and we had a blast under the snow storm. Opera at the Metropolitan also got checked out of my to do list.
Nina was born! She is the cutest and she's one of my best friend's baby, so I feel I can call myself an aunt if I want to lol. And I'm longing for us to have a more accurate schedule compatibility, so I can spend more time with her and I already fantasize about how is it going to be years from now. :) (btw, if you read Portuguese, you can fallow her and her mommy's adventures here).
Joined a gym (the place where I don't belong) and started swimming again (4 times a week). I know all about the "no pain no gain" stuff. Hate the gym! But must keep going!!!
Work's crazy as always. (but I still love it) I'm crazier than ever! (and becoming a facebook expert. Watch out Zukerberg!!!) (if you have facebook, here it is)

Well, I guess that's it!
Some images for the road (I have so many rolls to develop that my iphone pics will have to do for now)